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I sat there, my beer for company, and cried, and drank more beer.I remembered Jin, and thought: I need company, but am I fair to her? I sent her a sms, said ‘can’t just now em’. For some strange reason, I went to shower again, and put on the shorts and t-shirt Hong had worn for a short time – a muted smile when my t-shirt, indeed, seemed to have stretched over her breasts! That made me cry all over again and I buried my face in my hands for a minute or two.Yen had been as a daughter to me, yes, and more recently she had been my Love and my lover, the one I had thought would be in my life, and my life, for the future. What does my life hold for me now – though I had a wife in Thailand that was, these days, a friendship more than a marriage; yes, plenty of beautiful sex, but it had been thoughts of Yen which had sustained a feeling of Love within me these past months, within my heart. I am a sensitive person, very sensitive, and wounds to the heart hurt me, but I have had many and I. She had come home from work to an empty house. Literally empty, except for pieces belonging to her family, her husband cleaned out the house, and their bank account. Kind soul that he was, Dan did leave a note telling Jane his twenty-eight year old girlfriend was pregnant and he was going to do the right thing by her. It was as if he had shoved a knife in her heart. Jane couldn’t have children and in the back of her mind, she had always felt inadequate. She guessed the vows made thirty years earlier meant nothing. So, she was left alone to start over. Just what does a mid-fifties woman do? It would probably have been different if she had known about his indiscretion, but Jane was totally blindsided. She thought her marriage would last forever. But it didn’t, and here she was, on vacation, with her gorgeous sister. Jane – plain Jane, that’s what her father had always called her. She was not tall (5’5”), not blonde – mousy brown hair with some newly added blonde highlights. She missed.
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